6 Strategies I Use To Move Beyond Disappointment

Let’s be honest here – personal, professional, or romantic – getting over a disappointment can be very difficult – especially if it’s something you had your heart set on.

Then comes the emotional aftermath- anger, hurt, frustration, and the lingering thoughts of “What do I do NOW?”

I know this struggle intimately. I’ve wrestled with disappointments that felt like they defined me—unrealized dreams, a marriage that left me feeling unseen, a job opportunity that slipped through my fingers after endless interviews, or a frenemy I did not see coming.

You feel ashamed that you don’t bounce back faster, or immature because it bothers you for so long when you’re sure you should have gotten over it by now. You feel even sillier that the life you imagined so clearly is now only just that: a vision.

So, now what do you do when disappointment takes hold? Honestly, the only thing you can do – move forward the best way you can.

Here are the six strategies I use to shift my perspective, let go, and embrace new possibilites.

1. Avoid Getting Stuck in Discouragement

It’s okay to grieve the loss of what could have been. But don’t stay stuck in it too long.

Some disappointments only warrant a few minutes of frustration, like a ruined sweater in the dryer. Others—like losing a job or experiencing betrayal—deserve more space to process.

Acknowledge your feelings, reflect on what you’ve learned, and then take action toward healing. Staying in bed for a week won’t erase the pain, but moving forward—even slowly—will help you regain momentum.

2. Shift Your Perspective

Zoom out.

While a setback might feel overwhelming right now, how does it fit into the bigger picture of your life?

If it’s a minor disappointment, time will naturally soften its impact. If it’s something more significant, focus on gratitude, lessons learned, and how this experience shapes your future.

Also, consider how this situation affects others—sometimes, the pain we carry isn’t just ours to bear. Someone else may be hurting even more than we realize.

head and how you plan to get there.

3. Accept That You Cannot Change the Past

I’ve tried. It doesn’t work.

No amount of wishing, reimagining, or dwelling will undo what has already happened.

You have two choices:

1. Stay stuck in resentment, replaying the “what ifs.”
2. Accept the reality, release the burden, and move forward with intention.

Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting—it means refusing to let past pain control your present joy.

4. Examine Your Expectations

Disappointment often stems from expectations that weren’t met—but were they realistic?

• Did you expect too much from another person?
• Were you too hard on yourself?
• Were your goals truly attainable?

Reevaluating your expectations can help you set more aligned goals moving forward and prevent future setbacks from feeling so devastating.

5. Take a Personal Inventory

Before moving on, take a moment to recognize the strengths you bring to this moment.

• What skills have helped you through previous challenges?
• What resources do you have to support your next steps?
• Who in your life can help you navigate this transition?

You already have everything you need to heal—you just have to recognize it.

6. Reassess & Set New Goals

Every disappointment is a chance to redirect.

Each closed door presents a new opportunity—a new path, a new vision, a new lesson in resilience.

The pain of setbacks is real, but so is the growth that comes from them. Your strength isn’t measured by avoiding hardship but by how you choose to rise.

Moving Forward, One Step at a Time

Let’s get real! Moving on is not easy and healing takes time. But if you are willing to commit to moving forward and stay focused on new possibilities rather than “what could have been,”, then you are ready for the wonderful possibilities that await you.

Stay the course, take the time you need, and remember the value you bring to the table.

To a more empowered YOU…